Once you lose the innocence associated with pregnancy and having a baby, and realize that so many pregnancies end in heartbreak, nothing is ever really the same.
A woman close to me has finally succeeded in getting pregnant after nearly 3 years of fighting infertility. She's extremely high risk for failure and/or complications along her way to being full term. I am terrified for her. I know she's scared, and there's nothing I can do for her. I would do anything to shield her from this.
Between my own losses and the losses of my loved ones around me, every pregnancy scares me. I fear for every woman who finds themselves lucky enough to become pregnant. In nearly every case I would have given anything to be in their shoes... but that doesn't allay the terror that permeates me at even the thought of getting pregnant.
No matter how optimistic you are, after a loss or multiple losses, you can't hid from the fear. You can't hide from the knowledge that pregnancy isn't a fairy tale.
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