The LO's (Little Ones) seem to have sent a beautiful white Christmas our way this year.
The dogs are thoroughly enjoying it, and I can't say that I'm complaining either. I adore the snow. Creates such an amazing calm. We've gotten about 8 inches with more to come in the next few days.
There's a candle burning in the window to help me feel a little calmer as the sadness begins to well up inside.
The dogs are thoroughly enjoying it, and I can't say that I'm complaining either. I adore the snow. Creates such an amazing calm. We've gotten about 8 inches with more to come in the next few days.
There's a candle burning in the window to help me feel a little calmer as the sadness begins to well up inside.
Christmas is the time of year you are supposed to spend with your family. Your parents, grandparents, children... this year it is just Dave, the dogs, and I. I would do anything to have my LO's here.
To see their eyes twinkle in the light of the Christmas tree, throw them in the snow and have snowball fights, chase them off from shaking presents.... No matter the hardship that it would cause to have children right now, I still want them.
If I had my way I'd be pregnant, or trying to get pregnant right now. I would love to be able to announce a pregnancy on Christmas or New Years to our families.
This Christmas will be just like the last 5. A feeling of sadness that hovers right behind the mask of a smile to keep things happy and joyous for those around me. I fight to keep the happy present, because I don't want to ruin anyone's Christmas. Every year I take a little time (20 minutes or so) to just go cry in the bedroom/shower. I highly recommend it for any grieving parent- taking time for yourself can quite literally by a life saver.
To all my BLM friends out there, and their families, I wish you a gentle and very merry Christmas.
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